So, what does it mean to be “clean?"
For those of you who follow my blog and some of my other internet-based projects, you know I have particular point of view when it comes to gay men, sex and responsible sexual health.
Lately, I’m finding something I don’t think is all that cool. While I appreciate that some of you will not agree with this post – I do feel it has to be said as well.
If you get laid, have sex, fuck or get fucked, suck or get sucked – however, you want to label it- you are at risk for an STD. As uncomfortable as it may sound, it’s the way it is. This resurgence of the word “clean” as a way to describe ourselves in profiles and CL postings is not only inaccurate, it implies that being sexual makes us "dirty." And, it builds on the fear and ignorance that gets in our way of developing a confident sexual self-identity.
A few thoughts for those who use the word “clean” in your profile: Don’t fool yourself. Most guys with an STD don’t even know they have one, and they are not out to infect you intentionally. The only sure way to know you don’t have anything requires work, honesty and a lot of attention to your own sexual awareness. Being tested is a great start, but is not a guarantee.
Yup that’s right. Testing alone isn’t a guarantee you are not going to have (or get) something. If you don’t want to be exposed to an STD, your options are solo play or sex only with men, who are only having sex with you exclusively AND who have been tested in sequence with you (tested when you first meet, tested 3 months later, etc.) to...