Daddyhunt Blog Posts from September 2010

Even though we live in an era where homosexuality is openly discussed and increasingly tolerated if not totally accepted, those of us who are gay still feel we maintain a unique membership in a very select band of brothers. It doesn’t matter if we’re a mature 25 or young-at-heart 65; whether we live in an urban gay ghetto or a small town where our nearest neighbor is ten miles away; whether we consider ourselves God’s gift to gaydom and making it with guys three or four times a week, or just “average” (whatever the hell that means), content with a few friends, an occasional tryst, or just some good old, hard core porn.

But are we all that really different from our heterosexual counterparts?

Growing up, some us may have been the target of bullying or worst because of our sexuality, but aren’t kids harangued – or worst - for being too short, or too fat, or unathletic or nerdy in American jock society? I teach college and I’m endlessly amazed how many smart straight guys will hide their intelligence because they consider it “unmanly.”

When we’re young, don’t some of us focus on career building because we don’t have a wife and kids to worry about, while there are those of us who don’t really care what we do for a living as long as we can pay our bills and party? But are we are all that different from a straight Harvard grad or urban playboy?

Don’t some of us, despite our sexual leanings, consider marriage – to a woman - because we want children, feel it’s the right thing to do, or because of family or peer pressures? Even if we later regret it?...

There's an old Chinese proverb that for some reason always stuck with me: "When eating bamboo shoots, remember the man who planted them." My grandmother, neither Chinese nor proverbial, had her own version: "You've got 86,400 perfectly good seconds today. Take one to say thank you." I'm sharing these with you because a recent series of seemingly banal events in my life, when experienced together, have made me afraid. I'm afraid that we as gay men are relying too much on anger, and not enough on gratitude, to fuel our cause.

About a week ago, I was walking home down 9th Avenue here in NYC, and I saw a bus-stop-poster advertising "My Generation" (which I assume is a TV show). The tag-line read, "I'm tired of paying for your mistakes, Dad." A few days later, my firm (in the interest of disclosure, I own a boutique advertising/PR shop) took a pro bono account for In The Life Media's 13th Season Premiere honoring one of New York's most prolific gay philanthropists, Henry van Ameringen. The fact that the poster was for a TV show and leveraging anger, and "IN THE LIFE" is the longest running (and original) LGBT documentary series leveraging gratitude, made them click.

As I began exploring the account, I discovered that van Ameringen had funded so many New York-based LGBT charities for many, many years. I couldn't think of a single person I knew whose life hadn't somehow been improved by him -- mine included. I was dumbfounded, and ashamed. Ashamed that I had never even heard of van Ameringen before, and ashamed that the discovery made me realize how...

With the passing of another New York Fashion week, and the literal passing of many a hot model on the streets, my brain is just starting to digest all the new trends to come. But what struck me most this year, is how the simplest pieces of clothing and accessories tend to turn me on the most. Take my recent obsession with dark framed glasses. If I see a man in these Buddy Holly-esque frames, it’s an instant head turn for me (throw in some facial hair and you’ve got yourself a sealed deal). There’s not much to them, and they’ve been around for half a century, but lately they’re doing wonders for making some men instantly appealing. Maybe it’s the lingering geek association or the perceived wisdom that comes with them. Perhaps it’s the hope of hopes that the man behind them could be an intellectual capable of deeper thinking and higher learning. Whatever it is, they’re working for me in a big way this year.

It doesn’t take the latest looks from Milan or Paris to get my catwalk up and running; a Daddy in the classic jeans and t-shirt look is usually about all it takes to get my sexy meter at full tilt. I guess when it comes down to it, comfort and the way someone wears a look is worth a lot more in the end then that $700 sweater from Barneys. If you’re most relaxed in a pair of sweats and a torn up T, then that may be the sexiest of all.

Of course, naked is fun and underwear is a whole other post unto itself, but leaving even just one piece of clothing on - whether it be a tie, tube socks, or even your pants can sometimes make things even hotter then...

To help get your week started off right, every Monday we'll be featuring a Daily Daddy. The DD will be a mix of hot photography from the internet, members like you, and once a month we'll pull from our Daddy Hall of Fame. If you've got a good candidate for the Daily Daddy, send your picks and/or pics to participate@daddyhunt.com with the subject "Daily Daddy".