The Modern Gay Fairy Tale
We gays are often portrayed as courting drama . And while many of us avoid it at all costs, I can't help but wonder if it's inherent in our programming. Show of hands, when it comes to relationships, how many of you had a healthy, visible real life gay couple to look up to? And now one more time, show of hands, how many of you spent your formative years hiding, lying, and/or putting on a show to avoid your big gay secret from coming to light? Okay, hands down. I can't imagine many of you raised your hands for that first question, and that's no fault of yours. When I think back to my gay childhood there are certain things I cling to and they all revolved around story telling. Whether it was in the movies, on tv, or in a book, the love stories and relationships that I looked up to were all pure fiction. In the absence of a real gay relationship they're all I had. But the one common thread, and the unfortunate mark of any good love story, is that they all have obstacles to overcome. And there in lies the problem when holding your real life standards to the stories you grew up with.
I could go on about this topic, as I have at length with plenty of friends, but I'd love to hear from all of you. Do you often find yourself seeking relationships that are either unrealistic or require some miraculous turn of events for them to work out? Like the cold and distant fuck buddy who one day wakes up and is ready to be your boyfriend? Or the married man who leaves his husband for you? Or the troubled porn star/escort/stripper who quits the business to be with you and only you?
Sound off on your theories below and let's get into it!